Happy Thanksgiving!

Jen and I didn't travel anywhere this year. Dad came by for a spell and hung out. Mom had plans over a cousin's house. We just chilled. I'm sure Christmas will be different.
We will however be heading to Dallas for our nephew's playoff game at Texas Stadium on Saturday. He's a Senior leading running back at Arlington Bowie. He's always had football in his heart starting at a young age. Travis is strong and has a lot of tenacity! Go Volunteers! Well, I thought I'd share a Thanksgiving pic. Tomorrow's my 5 yr anniversary! Another big post awaits!!!! Blessings...

Happy Holidays!

I hope everyone who chose to celebrate, had a blessed and Merry Christmas! Including today, there's only 5 more days left in 2007 and that's a wrap! Let's make the best of it!

Jen and I spent Christmas day with my Goddaughter Kalee and her family. It's been pretty much an annual event for me for over 10 years.

Oh yeah, I forgot to add our Elf Yourself.

From New York to Mexico to Washington, DC

Well, I guess I can say that this is the summer of travel for me. It all started in May when I told my cousin Chris that I wanted to share in the celebration of her getting her bachelor's degree from Monroe College. The graduation was oddly on a Monday, June 11th, but since school was out for us, I was determined to be there. She and are are the same age and I've watched her from a far work two jobs and raise her daughter as a single mom and go to school. She's got a lot of strength and when she has her eyes on the prize, she goes and gets it! Jen decided she'd join me and what do you know, they overbooked our flight from Waco to DFW! We were given $500 in travel voucher and a nice free trip in a white stretch limo in return for giving up our seats. We had a nice relaxing time hanging out with family and just chillin' lazily around good ole' Money Earnin' Mt. Vernon, NY. We even got to check out my cousin's daughter, Jade play a few games of minor league baseball. She just turned nine in May and is a little athlete, I might say!

We spent quality time with my aunt, uncle, and my other cousins and before you knew it, it was time to go! The graduation was beautiful, even though it poured down raining afterwards. During the trip however, I spent a good amount of time chatting back and forth with Sunsail who had planned a trip to see her mother in Brooklyn and Cluizel, who just happens to be a native of Mt. Vernon, about how we could all hook up at Carol's Daughter and perhaps go out to eat in the city. Unfortunately, Sunsail and I didn't get to meet, but we had so much fun chatting and going back and forth about blogging and Sisterlocks. I think I even spoke with her after the quite interesting conversation she had with her mother and aunt. I'll be in her area this week and hope we can get together. Jen and I did get to meet Miss Cluizel and Mr. Nicolay on our last night in town. Please view the slide show.


My trip to Mexico seemed to have flown by. It's hard to believe it's over. Hopefully the pictures will express the beauty of the area I stayed as well as visited. Now all my photos from my Mexico trip aren't organized, but if time permits before school starts, I'll put together a whole video. If not, what you see is what you get. Of course I know eleven days is not enough to soak it all up and return fluent and all, but it was definitely a kick in the pants to get serious about getting my Spanish back. I shall be enrolled in night classes this fall and doing private study on my own. Photos from my fotki album are here.

Now on to Washington, DC. I accepted a position at a school in our district, G.L. Wiley to teach 7th Math. I am scared, nervous, anxious, excited, and all those feelings 1st yr teachers have, I suppose. The school was on the brinks of closure this year but the state is going to give them one more chance to get their act together. The principal was a 6th grade Math teacher and the person I am replacing was promoted to Instructional Specialist at the same school. Also, on top of that, the 8th Math teacher was moved to that school specifically to help improve TAKS test scores because of her experience and expertise. She really turns students around. I say all that to say, he (the principal) assured me I was going to get good support. The school has had several years of a black cloud hanging over it, so it will be a challenge as well as a motivation to do my job and do it well. The student population is predominately black in a cyclical low income, high crime, drop out, high drug etc. area. Even with the negative stigma that has been placed on the school, I am hopeful.

Well in the morning, a group of about 40 of those students from the school will be taking a nine day Civil Rights Heritage Tour. Most of these children would never have an opportunity such as this to leave their home town and visit places in geography and history which focus specifically on Black History. The County Commissioner, Lester Gibson, who organizes this annually, counts it a pleasure to serve this particular black community's youth by exposing them to this type of excursion.

We will depart at 6:30am in the morning en route to West Memphis, Arkansas by tomorrow evening. Friday (20th) we depart for Lenoir, Tennessee by way of Franklin. Saturday (21st) we leave Tennessee for Roanoke, VA, and by Saturday night, we should be in Landover Hills, MD. I'll be calling Sunsail cause she said if I got close, she'd try and catch up with me. We will spend the next three days from Sunday-Tuesday in the DC area with our state Senator, Chet Edwards, Capitol area tour, and a visit to Howard University. We may go to church, too, but I am not sure where. By Wednesday morning (25th), we will make our retreat back to Waco via the same route arriving back home into Waco by 5:30pm Friday July 27th.

Well as usual I have to do the dreaded packing, which I totally abhor, but since we meet at 6:30 in the morn, I guess I'll stay up til I can't stay up no more.

I'll have to attend to the requests in the Locked Hair Blog Exchange in August. I'm too tired right now. Blessings.

Family, Friends, and Foes-Natural Hair Woes

The following is a reply to some concerns one of my friends on Lockitup
was experiences concerning friends and family and her locks.
The exchange is below:

Subject: Re: I need your opinion....(Crickett)

I'll respond in between your lines...This is long, but worth the
read.

Maryee

Crickett wrote:

----Now my locs are between 4-5 inches long and I had the
twisted up in an updo.----

You mess around and get some length, that talking starts to
simmer down and those who were complaining start looking
more closely, inquiring more, and the butter starts to melt. At
this point, she's trapped by her opinion and pride will keep
her bound from submitting to the truth of how lovely your
locks are.

----She asked me how long was I going to let my hair stay
like this and I let her know until God takes me away.----

Good one. I came from a sales background and one of the top
skills reps need to have is the ability to overcome the objection
before it is given. As locked natural hair wearers, we have to
have our information ready to discuss, positively, intelligently,
and passionately before the ignorant and uninformed start
spewing their unknown knowledge about something they know
nothing about. When we handle ourselves "civilly", with clarity
and accurate information, that is better than acting out. Doing
that only makes us look just as foolish as them. I like your quote
and I'll have to put that in my back pocket for future use.

----She said that this just was not one of the hair do's that she
liked and she has not seen anyone with this type of hairstyle that
would make her say she would want to have her hair this way. I
told her I loved my locs and this was the best thing I could have
done to my hair. I told her I didn't loc my hair for her to like
or anyone else. As long as I was happy, that is what made the
difference. I told her she liked her curl, and as long as she
liked it, it didn't make me any difference how she wore her hair.----

A lot of time folks are defensive because our freedom to be real
amplifies their struggle to be fake. It puts them in an
uncomfortable place. Defense mechanisms kick in and they work from
the premise and limited knowledge they have. God bless their
souls. I've been there before.

----When she realized she could not intimidate me or make me feel
ashamed of my hairstyle, she left well enough alone. I told her I
have pretty natural hair, whether it is locked or loose, and I just
choose to have it locked. She is the only person that I have come
across that has this attitude towards my locs because she doesn't
like them. She said she didn't understand why anyone would want
their hair like this. I told her, that is it, you don't
understand. It is not that she doesn't like natural hair, it is
strictly the locs. LOL My aunt has been natural before, but she
just didn't know what to do with it and so she went back to the
chemicals. ----

There is always a root to anyone who bars bitterness or disdain for
a way of thinking, looking, or acting. I saw the most bizarre thing
at church on Sunday. There was this elderly lady (around early 70s
I believe) who sat in the pew in front of me. In front of her was
the associate minister, his wife and their 9 year old daughter. The
daughter had her hair corn rowed back with hair added to touch about
3 inches past her shoulders. The elderly lady reached in front of
her and began running her fingers through the girl's loose braids
and sort of "straightening" out the top and tossed the ends back
over her shoulder, examined them some more and then patted them
neatly on her back and then sat back in her seat. She had on a red
outfit with a matching red hat with netting and what looked like a
short cut reddish maroon straight haired wig peeking out from under
the hat. I'd never seen the lady before and the girl never turned
and looked at her like, "Lady, can you get your hands out of my
hair!" It then occurred to me that the elderly lady seemed to be
fascinated and intrigued with the little girl's braids. I was
thinking, "Is this lady "desiring" or "admiring" this girl's hair?
Synthetic and all? Women and men can get away with that with kids
before they could with grown folks. It was such a weird scene. Did
she do that because she was curious, perhaps? Humm??

I say all this to say, for a lonnnnng time we have been conditioned
a certain way. Nappy, kinky, curly (not Jherri Curl) is ugly,
dirty, nasty and hard to deal with. Straight and permed is right,
better, easier, and beautiful. If we are all honest with ourselves,
most of us had to battle some demons running rampant in our heads
about our hair and what it says about us. We still deal with it
daily.

My 9-yr old niece is already brain washed real good. Her mother and
her mother's mother (may she rest in peace) have been telling her
all her life (since she could understand) that her hair is nappy and
that she was born with a head full of nappy hair and it can't be
combed in it's natural state, which very well may be true. That was the last thing her grandmother said to me last week before she died. "Nikki's was born
with a head full of nappy hair!" She said it right in front of the
child, I guess to allude to the fact, making it known that her "bad
hair" came from our side of the family and not hers. "Khris's hair
wasn't like that", she said speaking of her grandson by another man
other than my brother.

My niece has had enough fake hair braided, crocheted, and the like
to fill a barn. I guess I would have begged for it myself if I didn't want to had to
deal with or possibly be ridiculed perhaps at school for having "nappy hair".
Just here recently I finally saw her hair without extra hair, but she was "going to get her hair braided later that night." And you gonna tell me that wont breed a seed of self hatred for her natural hair, which she has NEVER seen because her mom started perming her hair some time after she turned two years old? My niece's mom the other day was saying, "Well everyone has their own opinion about how they wanna wear their hair", all the while digging, scratching, and
fuming because she wanted her "down her back" straight weave she got
put in a week before taken "out of her hair." It's tough, but we have to stay in the game and "represent".

Well, I'm done with my essay for the evening. Just thought I'd do
some responding to your post Crickett as I myself continue to work
out this natural hair dilemma was have upon us.

Here's a picture of my sweet niece with her bunny she got for
Christmas. She longs for long hair, and is quite aware of her "nappy" hair.

http://i27.photobucket.com/albums/c164/Franie811/Family/PC300001.jpg

We found out Saturday evening her granny passed away Thursday Dec.
29th. She was a heavy smoker and her heart just stopped.
Thankfully Nikki and her granny did spend earlier that day shopping,
so her last experience with her granny was pleasant. Please pray
for the family during this time of grief.

Dec 29th, 2005

Crickett,

It's funny because as I am putting all the pieces together in my
blog, I just might get to the root of the matter concerning what I
did cause I liked it or wanted it, or what I did with my hair for
all the other various reasons. I remember wanting weave so I could
finally have some hair to throw around like my friends in
cheerleading in high school. Deep huh? Or perhaps the earliest
brainwashing came from good ole' Tuesday Taylor? All you Barbie
fans from back in the day know who she is.

I will tell you that I have had hair problems personally since I was
about 5 years old according to what I remember suffering under
myself. Follow my blog and you'll read some of the crazy things I
experienced. Once I find all the pictures and upload em' with
stories to accompany them, it will all make sense. Thanks for
sharing!

Maryee


Hey Maryee,

Thanks, but you know before I loced, I was the crochet, weave
and braid queen. I've received those comments from some
individuals about the weave. You know, "why you putting that stuff
in your hair." And my response "cause I like it." (lol) So I
was fortunate that my hairstyles regardless to what they, didn't
come from peer pressure, family traditions, etc. Plus I have
always been a hair person, so I was always doing something to my
head. But locing was the best thing I have ever done.

Crickett

Family Ambush

Posted in Lockitup as a response to another member sharing with us about how her family ambushed her concerning her locks in a negative way. Here's my take on the matter:

Re: Family Ambush! (long)-Maryee

Michelle,

When I went home to Houston over the holidays I only had my locks in
about a month. So you know it was during the baby stage where
there's really no controlling the locks.

A close girlfriend of mine kept looking up side my head as to want
to "straighten" the "wild" pieces. She held out as long as she could
and finally blurted out, "Are you going to put that in place?"
(meaning my hair). I politely smiled at her and said, "It is in
place and exactly where it's supposed to be. They are my wild
teenagers and there's no controlling them at this point."

Not so sure my reply satisfied her need to "shape and correct" my
mini lock fro, but I guess it sufficed. All she's known in her 50
years is perm, perm, perm. She meant no harm, it was just "different"
seeing me like that up close and personal.

In Texas, it's a lil' hard in some areas where "permed" hair gives
over the allusion that you are cleaner, smarter, and prettier, and
that to have locks or natural hair means otherwise. It's like this
hidden shame.

My 74 year old aunt shouted at me back in April when I went to visit
in Houston also, "I don't like those dredlocks!" I told
her, "Auntie, this is the same hair from the picture I sent you in
the mail in January where you said I looked beautiful. These are not
Dredlocks, they are called Sisterlocks". Not so sure if trying to
explain the difference helped any or mattered one way or another
to her. She already had her opinions (deep rooted) about nappy hair.
I guess the picture didn't depict my locks and when she got a "close-up"
she decided to change her mind. The picture I'm talking about is in my
photo link with the pink background. It does look like unlocked hair in the
picture, so I guess she just assumed otherwise. She too, forgot she saw me in
December as well.

I'm too at peace to be bothered with other folks not feeling me and
my Sisterlocks. My dad hates em' on me and my sister. Oh well! My
mom just goes along with whatever my and Jen come up with. Jen had
traditional locks some years back, so this shouldn't be that much of
a surprise to family and friends. They're just sweet ole' country
folks. :-)

I'm sooo thrilled to have Sisterlocks I could just shout! God bless
America, and God bless Dr. Cornwell.

I could write (and I just may do that one day) a book on all of my
haircare dramas alone over the past 25 years and I'm only 33. It's
been just that deep. Well, just wanted to share a blurb on my family
ambush.

Still debating on heading down to San Diego on Saturday for the reunion. If so, I'll
see ya folks there. Take care!

Maryee
Sisterlocked almost 8 months! :-)

Note:
My aunt Gustine I am speaking about has since gone on to be with the Lord on 9-1-05. May she continually rest in peace.